H

2005-01-11T04:40:00.000-08:00

i knew it all along that im not wrong.

it is not paranoidness.
it was jus a sense of fact.
a pack of fact.
x.x

who leave up to insults n nasty comments given to eu?
who likes it?
furthermore nasty nasty comments.
n is given by ppl younger den eu.
n on top of that.
its someone u eyed for gan
di / mei.

there is no escape.
- toxic -

hope that what goes around comes around -

there is just this horrible feeling inside me.
peeps A.
is like not used to be wad we used to be.
like.
they go with the others?..
n.. what the hell?..

n

peeps B.
are good to mee?
wait for mee?
like..
well..

- its like -
- around the world -

i always feel that i have got pure best friends.
but i dunched.
friendship is no longer the one i used to define.
1st is A.
now is B.
next is C.
till Z?

x_x
unregretable moves.

2005-01-10T01:45:00.000-08:00

im full of words inside me.
but i dunch noe which words are better not to be bloged.
which is better to be bloged.

well.i will start a topic.
which i think its not too right to say.
its.
but wadeva.
jus sae for saeing.
but i will not reveal names.

x))

well it is jus like a deeper explainatory -

- i -
believe it anot.
alwaes put my friends before me.
well. i admit not all friends.
but for sure my best friends.
be it u are my best friend anot.
it does not really matter.
im gulity.
im a failure.
reason been.
tell me.
im which of my best friend PURE best friend.

maybe im.
maybe im paranoid.
but till now.
i m still standing here firmly n saying it
without 2nd though.
that yesh
im noone 's PURE best friend.
i lead my life with just me treating them the best.
well i will not denie that they do treat me really nice ^^
but
it all depends
on
- when
- who we are with
- their mood

a more clearer point.
- who we are with -
its a clear cut.
look.
this friend A.
well. i like sticking to my friends ( no denies )
i just dun like the feeling of
being alone.
thats just not me to be alone.
friend A does precisely treat me good n in some condition friend A will treat me not so nice.
i mean.
it really depends on who friend A is with.
to proof that im not PURE '' ''
when will friend A treat me like *THEIR* good/best friend.
is of cuz.
when *THEIR* another friend is not here.

so its jus so UNPURE
of cuz.
i cant wish for much -

be contented.

so
i jus have to live with it.
that
im
just
a
UNPURE
sadistic boy.

- - -

i see eu lots of time a dae.
eu look left i look right.
wads the point.
all eu do is jus let it abit.
den can liao wad.

dun have to live so horribly.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

stress ar..
art.. - so many to draw lehx. cant finish -
maths.. - homework everydae ar -
physics.. - 3 sets ar -
english.. - sighs -

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

i wan change 303.
but she..
haiz..
i dun wan 303.
i dun like 303.
i like 302.
302 is my heaven filled with friends class.
all my peeps are there.
except for my 2 bestest peeps =s.
but still.
other peeps.
hais..

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

303 - hell for me.
303 - heaven for eu. x((.
302 - okok for eu.
302 - heaven for me.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

of cus eu have a mind of urs.
i admit of being abit self centered.
but i really cant stand 303.
its fucking nuts.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

im not a christian.
but now i really wish.
may god bless me.
may he grant my wish.

_____________________

for reading only `]]
no offence `]]
no hard feelings `]]

. sian .
. i wan change skin .
. but no time niah .
. sian lor .
. yucks lor .
. fuck .
. crapified .
. sucks to be eu .

2005-01-06T03:48:00.000-08:00

boo.
school.
-unsightly matters-
i hate eu.
i hate sch.
becuz of eu.
to sae bias-nes
who is not bias?

-noone is not-

me?
pure bias towards my bestest friends * those cream of the crops *
which is like duh.
1st : chin how * like duh * ( who duno can die )
2nd:clifford * well * -surprise surprise-
3rd:lihao & feesee * grins *
only reveal top 3..
lol.. but who cares..
its jus liddat huh..

x)). my smiles seems geniune.
but they are not jus a smile that simple.
they are forced out.
they are made.
they are processive smiles.

okok.
wadeva.
noone wish to noe.
its jus a pathetic fellow here.
hello?!
it is.

jus.

PURE - pathetic.
PURE - lame.
PURE - lonely.
PURE - dumb.
PURE - ugly.
PURE - everything that is bad.
add up = richie x))

for being just me.
i say its me.

will i use the word fuck for this.
be it fuck or suck.
it is still.
conclucion=yucks yah?

for being in a class.
for being his emeny.
for being frendless.

for being me.
who does not have a PURE best frend.
who i treat them as best frend but im not their best frend.
well.
im jus a failure.
in friendship or studies.
conclusion = failure.

for being sensitive.
makes me a new aged guy.
are you gonna be shock?
i beg not.
x((

must the sec 1s like the school
*grins*
*boo*
yucks n yeeps x))

8.15 pm.

it have been 2 daes since i touch com.
school must have been busy.
just 4 daes.
its already hell x((.
sucks to be eu xD.
x((.

may u get e retribution.
learn.
n learn it well.

appreciate.
share.
observe.
be smart.

like i said.
i might not be the cream of the crops.
but my effort is better den that.
but.
x((.
eu noe the ending.

for ppl who are reading this entry n
are
confused.
den.
aww.
be more observant in school.
alright?

like it is quoted.
- a picture speaks a dozen words -
n
clifford interesting quote.
it takes 2 hands to clap. but 1 hand to flash the finger to YOU.

may u.
may it be good or bad.
all the best.
i will

not.

fucking

give.

- up -

for me to sae die.

eu wan me to give up.

maybe u could try.

coming right up my face n tell me

that eu did not enjoyED the friendship?

yah? that might help eu.

i hope not.

*grins*
may it fuck u alive.
may it suck u dry.
may ur finger flash it to eu urself.
x)).
not being mean.
not being sicked.
not being hateful.
jus being fair.
jus being ....

- in the end it will be okay. if it is not okay, it is not the end. -
will u heed that phrase? it the world that perfect? ___ _ i wouldnt dare to answer that.
its just a question mark.

rot n die.

2004-12-31T08:24:00.000-08:00

hey there.
it is my 4th blog of the dae.
feeling = "its the end"
listening = "in the end"
n i wanna tell u.
THE END!

to remember.

-januray-

hey hey!
its a new day!
new class!
new friends! =))!
new peeps!
new teachers =((!
new homework! =DD!
new enviroment! =((!
new richie! "/ !
look look!
it was the new aged one!
the defined as - not so cute one - =((
-maturing that it is!
made myself sit with bingsheng.
he was jus moi best frend that period of time.
anders was left out.
so i ask him to sit behind me.
sorry anders =)).
u rock my world. =)).
u are jus being so kind.

n xue qi ( my msn frend ).
sat jus behind beside me.

n.
i was scared =xx.
i dun wan ppl to see me.
i was jus a face not nice to be shown around..
it was.. nothing.. but a ugly me..
but still.. i have to show it..
den.. tok to peeps around.
sitting beside me was cheryl khoo. =)).
nice gal.
i was made a prefect.
but i noe i was not that perfect.
but i did not cared.
cuz i was given a chance.
i will make use of it.
i will love it.
sec 1 oriteertation camp.
was a junk for me.
1st time.
yet gave me the decision that it was the last time for me.
my parther juz fuck up with me.
=((.
i was jus being who im.
which is shy.

why im shy?.
im born this wae.

live with it.
the sec 1s peeps are so cute.
i was abit -tsk- to see so many sec 1 peeps.
horrified.
i was not happy.
i was not sad.
but i love the way they are like.
some do really cheer me on.
they rock as naive as they are.
they are jus who they are.
i love brothers n sisters.
care should be given.
im jus a little small boi boi.
i was shack after all the 2 daes.
how weak
sighs.
=)).
ncc wor.
ncc do suck.
but do rawk.
i love being with ncc peeps.
but i do hate the sirs when they are fucking unreasonable n ABUSING rank.
fuck it.
watch us PLAY WITH U when we are higher above u.
will step on u back.
watch it.
u will never noe.
-end of sec 1 camp-
went back class
ahhs.. it was the feel..
the feel of stress again awaits me..
but i love stress..
come on!
stressed spelt backwards.
= DESSERTS. dun u love desserts? dumbo! x))
i love u.
love as in frends =)).
i really love u peeps. LOL.
wait. i m not expressing my LOVEly-ness here.
i m jus trying to say.
i love u peeps. LOL.

- jan was jus a start of my hardship -

-febraury-

well.
i cant remember much here.
but i noe i made a friend.
i made chin how as a friend.
=)).
i add him in msn.
i sms him.

we chat.
we became friends.
still can only remember.
nicol came to me.
ask me im close to fs.
i say erm.
kinda.
he say.
help him.
n i was o.O.
den oh.
den ok.
den promised.
den i when console fs.
but i oso meant well for fs.
wad i told u fs is really from my true heart.
i tot he was just nice for you.
i did not noe it turn out to be a joke.
sorry for my bad advices.
they meant no harm.
=)).

i was made the vice chair man.
boo hoo hoo.
i suck as a prefect or a vice chair man.
but im still wad im.
im given wad i have.
i jus accept the fact.
n say thank eu veri muchie.
=)).

n!!
fs was like sad one..

den she ask me help her buy pen knife.
she started to be scary.
=s.
lols.
i tried to help.
it was helpless.=s
it was also the month of valentines day.
i bought roses for them =)).
went jp buy de. =)).
i think 2.50 per stalk. or 4 bucks. i cant remember.
only remembered that lihao feesee n colin went with me =)).
n fs n i was having trouble writing teacher names.
lolz. we sat at the gate. slowly writing.
hopelessly writing.
feb is the month i 1st write a testimonial.
wahahas. =)).

- feb was jus like a flash. but i love the flash of pictures of a new beginning -

- march -
still. we still stay back for no reason after school.
pure fun.
i enjoy it =)).
i really enjoy it. =)).
i love it!. =DD.
u rock my time!
my world!
my sorrowness was postpone by u guys. =)).
we cele cliffy birthdae!
once again.
happy birthdae clifford the great. LOL.
x)).
1 year of promotion of hiding a handphone without parents knowing.
well done man. =))

was all the while homework homework n homework.
but i think this was the month ms oh teach us yeahz.
she was kind =)).
sweet.
but!
i nv understanded her teaching.
LOL. =((.
made me hate maths.
fear maths.
drop maths.
say maths sucks.
say maths haunts.
say maths makes me mad.
but afterall.
maths was jus my favorite subject.
i love maths.
i love sums.
i love adding my marks to 90+.
woohoo.

- april -

oh muwah god!
april fool!
u are a fool!
boo hoo!
fool fool fool!
- u made a fool out of everyone -
wahaha. that was the point! FOOL U FAGGOT!
tada- it was the fall of prefects.
n the start of student councillor n sheriffs.
the prefects are all not happy.

sad.
but still.

they big boss always got the 2nd say no matter wad the hell.
=).
like it says.
"BIG"
i m supposed to go for the thumbs up program.
but in the end i help mr lee n mrs chin .
jun wen n me was the helper of mr lee.
den he came asking me.
richie right ur name?
i say yah.
he say.
are u interested in being a student councillor?
i say yah.
den he say.
ok ar.. on ar..
i will book u from mr thumb.
wahahaz.

i was so happy.
but -tsk-
it was moi birthdae!
damn!
=DD.

they bought me a ice cream mango cake.
wahaha.
they threw the cake CREAM around.
blah blah.

i received presents from peeps.
n my di n my mei.
=)).
thank u ppl.
i m so greatful.
n isabel.
feesee .
kai ling.
wrote things on a paper plate n gave me.
lol.
well.
i kept it of cuz.
=)).
that dae was not only my birthday.
it was samuel n shi hui n kamisah 's too!
april 12 sure is a famous dae.
=)).
i wish i was never born.

why did i reached the egg 1st?
why not my friends reach 1st?

- tsk -
i rember ms toh gave me a sweet.
=)).
n she say " richie do enlarge ur handwriting "
lol. =)). it was small.
it was big.
it is normal now.
i guess.
=)).
she let us hear a song " black or white "
" beat it "
n
i kinda like the song
=)).
it was sports dae on 15.
it was boring.
boring.
n boring.
it was held beside roy's house =)).
when his house n change after dat.
n had pizza hut =)).
wrote letters with feesee x)).
i do sometimes enjoy expressing myself to her LOL.
she can really relive at times =)).
lihao too =)).
--
at times
we stay back.
shu xian draw my back.
play.
n say i like her small bro.
o.O.
lol.
xP.

--

-may-

celebrated lihao's birthday.
we only buy card i think.
ops? lol. =s

had pizza with fisie.
* tsk *
- ppl took we couple -
* tsk *
---

bs play with chilli sauce
n anders pants kana the chilli sauce.
LOL.
anders use my bag to cover.
LOL.
hahahahahahahha.. =DD.
soo funni!
he was acting so faggot that dae.
=)).
he was always matured young man to me
lol. like. the solo adult in class.
---
17 of may. they came my house. play play. lol.
18 of may. we went to library to do art.
19 of may. finally finish all the exams. =DD.
n is bs burfdae at pizza hut.
i bought a cake for him =s.
fs choose i pay.
lol
after that. some of them came my house again. =)).
watch van helsing.
what the hell!
it is hellYEWnoe a NICE SHOW!
- holiday holidae holidaes - =)).

-june-
there was a blackout.
a major one..
it is holiday =)).
n of cuz. we are in the mood of holidays =). wahaha.
it is.
go out
go out.
n
go out sessions.
=)).
is so the rocks
but.
things was not nice this holiday.
be4 holiday i quareled with lihao. =((.
n i was not so angry.
he tot i was.
so he go out nv jio me.
lol.
=((.
but even if he jio me.
i will no go too.
=)).

to think back then.
i think there was a big big big misunderstanding between me n 105 gang.

this month.
was the saddest month i ever came across.
my greatest nightmare befalls in front of my own eyes.
it is jus liddat.
gone.
in a few secs.

=((.
- i wish to keep this enclose to myself in my heart -
- it is too pirvate for me -
- i dun wish to say wad happen -
- it is living hell -
- it is sure a tortue -

lihao sms me n ask me wan go sentosa n ask me dun angry me.
i was NOT angry.
but im not free.
n im sad.

so i nv reply.
but i realy wan to go.
but i cant.
=((.
it was a regret i did not go.
but i really cant go.
=((.

- open up ur eyes. -

i juz close myself up this holiday.
it was hell.
hell.
hell.
n hot burning hell.

-----
i love u.
i miss u.
i wan to hug u.
i wan to kiss u.
i wan u.
- why why why why -
-----

- july -

=)).
this is an important month.
it was a month we become from friends to best/good friends.
=)). we start from a scratch. it was pure scratch.
it was not a easy task.

but we manage to be damn good friends =).
i treasure our friendship alot.
u are sure good n trustworthy dude.

=)).
u are special in the way u are.
u are unique in the way u are.
u are my best friend in the way u are.
we
morning together.
recess together.
after school together.
go out together.
it was jus never ending friendship x)).
it was nice.
it was excellent.
it was angelic.
it was heaven!
it was ENJOYED by me.
it was something i long for.
it was something i liked.
it was something i yawn for.
it was something i craze for.
it was something i pray for.
it was something i wished.
it was something i wished for.
it was something i hope for.
it was something i love having.
it was jus so
- heaven feel -
napfa lolx.
u told me u wanted 1st.hahaha
but u did not in the end.
but dun give up =)).
u can do it =)).
moi 2.4 was shit.
pure shit.
pure stress.
pure TRIEDNESS.
pure hammering process.
pure crap.
x((.

- august -

* toot toot toot *

- sep -

- i will jus copy / paste my old post -
- it was still the same old me -

things juz happen really fast.. too fast indeed.. just liddat one week past.. well.. now.. we are like duno each other liao? haiz.. duno u lahz.. can't we juz be like be4? u juz dun wanna gimme a chance =\.. said as "u notice u neglecting the other part of ur life.." now.. u neglecting us.. what the.. ok.. maybe u juz wanna avoid me.. or.. my sight annoys u further.. by all means.. tell me.. den i will not go with themz.. if u avoid them juz becuz of preventing urself from seeing me.. den dun.. tell me that n i will not be with them..
really..i duno wads so annoying when i folo u..others folo u can..i folo u cannot..what the..sorry if i m such a irritant to u.. i did not know all along.. still.. i will change.. but.. no chance given.. i can pratically do nothing..
u hate my behavior of avioding [A].. u ask me to give [A] a chance.. i listen to u i gave [A].. now.. i ask u give me chance.. u dun wan.. n u aviod me.. haiz..
wellz.. i act as though i dun care.. but.. u will never know how sad i m.. yes.. [B] is ur best friend.. [C] [D] [E] all are.. i understand..
sorry lorz.. i did not noe.. gimme a chance will yahz.. =\.. anyways.. maybe now i m ur emeny.. but u will always be my best friend =\.. all i can do is to hope for u to gimme a change barhz.. i juz can't let go our friendship.. =\..
_u r a inspiration for me_` i m a irritant for you_

----

things heaven got off my mind`u r still as important`_consoling cum convicing myself_` loading myself with reason n possibities maybe juz for one reason`_that is?`_i duno myself` juz too important =))`
life heaven change seens thenz` u lead ur own life when i lead my own` still wishing n hoping we can juz be like last time` by thinking of it itself` what a treat is ur friendship to me` _now its losts_ jus tryings to hunts its backiiiee`possible anots`_hope so`_anyways i will not stop trying de larhs` i would not let you too` juz imagine the level of contentedness if you tell me that you will give me a chance` heh` wad a dream` =\ _ juz hope _ juz try _ dun give up`
anyways,recently this weekz`_ busily loaded myself with exams`_ haha _ struggled thru nights juz to buckler up my knowledge` tried to find the key to lock those informations intos mys minds` _ sad kid indeed i m`
i guess you stole my loling soul too`_ itz gone`_ no enjoyment in loling_ totally "flat" lol` =((
importance -> our friendship > 105`03 friendship `?` i guess so`_ anyways it can't be helped` if you wans it to be liddat, i only juz try to twist it, cannot change it`_ i m fighting a tough battle` _ act as though i m in some play or so ever`_act unhurt_act blur`_act happy`_n by all means run`run all u like`_dun see me_dun see you
what did i do that deserve such a big retribution`_ i juz dun guess it`_ reallyz _ wo zhen de dang ni shi bao ke shi ni dang wo shi cao_ ` cao ye hao bao ye hao`_ shuo shi me ye shi si lou yi tiao`_ wo bu yao`
oh yeshz` toking much of these`_ i got my imagination ranning wild`_ thought of possible reasons` ha`
______________________________nooooo iiiiii duuunnnnooooo annnnyyythhiiinnngg____________________________________
i only assume things` assumtion make me an ass damn it` make a fool of me` make a fool of everyone` look what i have done` i made a fool of everyonee`
i have got more to sae`_ but i shall keep it fers =))`+ i juz hope i juz wait i juz think`
hope my patients is worth the wait.. they often ask me ` is [you] worth my wait` i hope i m right`_-x [p]ra[y] x-_`
---
bla bla bla. that was my horrified sep.
i was never happy since
sep 29.

sep 29. i cried WOW.

but not alonely.
with fs.
lihao.
royston.
von.
shirley.
=((.

i cant believe it ended.
till now.
i miss it.
it was my mistake.
i wan to ment the hole.
u nv let me ment it.
u make the hole bigger n deeper.
u poke me when i wan to ment it.
i rot.
i cried.
i died.
noone pitys me.

----

october

i past this month with tortue n pain.

----

november

1st ecp trip with them
=).
it was fun =)).

this month.
very sian one.

decemember

chalet.
chalet.
=)).
sentosa - my happy planning that came real successful =)) -
merrie christmas!!
i bought for moi best frends.
chinhow -> ball
lihao -> cap
royston -> cant sae. he heaven take yet.
clifford -> book.
anders -> book.
fisie -> dog
isabel -> ear ring.
jinglin -> hello kitty.
kai ling -> pencil case.
von -> cow.

----
till now u dun wan to forgive me.
wad can i do.
i haf done my best.
i cant be ur best friend.
but wad i gave u.
was my best.
n.
i have got no regrets.

im rushing for time.
n lazie to blog liao.
so i end my 2004.
here.
with a FAKE smile =)).
2004.
rawk on.
byebye 2004.
hello 2005.
sucks to be u 2005 =).

2004-12-31T05:24:00.000-08:00

it was a joke.
it was a play.
it was a script.
it was moi life.
it was year 2004.
it was the 14th year in moi life.
it was the day.
it was the year.
it was when i found my most precious treasure.
it was the year the treasure beholds itself.
it was the year i found that i m a real fool.
it was the year i m antisocial.
it was the year i m sadist.
it was all begun cuz there is a dae in the year sep 29 2004 exists.
it was jus a mermory.
it was nothing but a piece of feeling in my heart.
it was when i feel i need more friends
it was when i feel happy with moi friends.
it was when i feel that my friends will be there to help me.
it was soon for me to realise that no. they are not there to help me.
it was a SURE thing i treasured them.
it was a SURE thing i love them.
it was a SURE thing i m bias towards them.
it was a SURE thing to say : yes. i enjoyed knowing u guys n being wad it takes to be jus ur friend. x))
it was my life that i play a role in.
it was then i noe that im jus a toy.
it was just a WHEN will i be
- USED.
- PLAYED.
- ENJOYED.
- PITYED.
- SLPIT.
- LAUGHED.
- WORE.
- SUCKED.
- THROWN.
LIVE WITH IT RICHIE.

2004-12-31T03:20:00.000-08:00

the chapter is a must to end todae.
do u forsee another nice NEW chapter ahead?
why are u so numb abt all these meaningful n important things?
u need a encore.
so u wad the hell are u waiting for?!
dun waste anymore second.

2004-12-31T02:08:00.000-08:00

how do you FEEL when you noe you are being TOYED around?

2004-12-30T04:39:00.000-08:00

i haf got nothing to blog.

plainly nothing

=s

im jus feeling very WERID.

sure werid =s

i feel as though i lost my friends

im always jus sensitive. =s

who noes it might be true . =s

so moody =s

2004-12-29T03:54:00.000-08:00

feeling=youNOEwad.

i jus changed my blockskin =s.

sentosa was jus :

2004-12-07T23:28:00.000-08:00

chalet!

jus came back from chalet ]]
was it fun? ]]
overall is ok ok lah ]]
i was wondering, why cant we jus stick together? ]]

alrightys. the night be4 chalet dec 5 , we had a conference which includes : clifford. lihao. yvonne. kai ling n me.
we tok some crap. n things like tml how. bring wad. wad time meet. so on n so for.
-dang-
lihao's handphone no batt so it hanged ALL of us up. [damn]
i was actually writing christmas card for my DEAR friends. LOL. [ so sorrie man.. i sumerge alot of the cards with ink ( no skill ) ] LOL.
but anyways.. it is the effort that counts =p.. lols..
early in the morning, kl msged me ask me wake her up at 11.

-dec 6-
tada! its todae!! i was kinda excited upon staying with friends xD ]]
waited for things to dry.. den finally yeah.. it dryED. n confirmed with lihao n the plan was :
1st dae : check in - escape - dinner - play - bath - eat - sun rise
2nd dae : wild wild wet
3rd : home
oh well. things did not turn out as planED. n of cuz the weather was not really kind on us too..
___
reachED jp control. saw zhengwei. den juz like 5 secs after i reachED clifford reachED too. so i decided to go buy some candles n sweets. on the wae saw brenda n ceryln stead. LOL. den went 1.99 shop. found candles n oso took a burning 'gel' LOL. how fun could that be?. along came 2 packets of sweets. den went to pay.

o.o went back there. everyone is there le. all waiting for lihao only. den called him. o.o he is juz above us. den we went up. met. go to white sands. the time taken is LONG. v LONG. n boring too.

finally reach le.
went down.
went ntuc.
bought things : $30
everyone suppose to pay me 3. lol.
took 154.
went downtown.
the trip was damn short. damn fast.
fs said ' why not we juz walk '
lol.

went too downtown enterance.
called chin xiang. he came out n 'brought' us in.
only got 4 tickets ( limited access )
1 : chin xiang
2 : lihao
3 : me
4 : kai ling

the others need pay $1 . =x

den. went in. WHAT THE HELL. SO SO dirty. menes on the bed. -.-. LOL. how dirty can they be?..
den we ate biscults we bought. the crumbs that drop on the floor. why do we throw it? uh uh. we sweep it under the bed. LOL. ( everyone do tat. tats why the room is a tortue ) LOL.

playED cards.

playED again.
cuz go escape cuz raining. everyone got that -_- look LOL. but well. cliff n i lookED at the bright side : DUN need use money. YAY.
den.. went to walk walk.. den went back chalet. LOL. how boring -.-. den the whole day is watch DVD. WALK. EAT. TOK. CARDs. o.o tats how we spend our time. but for clifford feesee n royston. they are unique.. they jump on the bed n film n take shots of themselves.. LOL.. how special.. LOL.. did silly things like.. putting head into the freezer to take foto.. LOL!. =x. their saying reason was ' nth to do wad ' LOL.
den.. the room totally like SMALL. 9 ppl cant sleep together. actually can if we squeeze. but. not co operative. [ like expected ] LOL. supposely was royston - feesee clifford - me lihao - zheng wei yvonne - kai ling n OPS chin xiang himself. o.o =x.
but later got cross section o.O.
[royston - clifford - feesee] (-_-) -.- diao. pang seh me. -.- . . den lihao kai ling von chin xiang zheng wei went out. o.o. left me with cliff fs n roy. o.o. . nth to do. . . continued to watch DVD. LOL. watch watch watch. they came back. den watch MORE. cards again. -.-. den me cliff fs n roy went outside to play fire. LOL. den gave up playing fire n went on to volleyball. LOL. but all out de. so i gave up playing with them n see them play. sitting along with roys n feesee. den there came clifford too. lol. fs was like ' why always we 4 de? ' xD. den slowly one by one all came to us. LOL.
den went back chalet. sit down. n tok abit. n guess wad?. they RAPED me. n took that video down. -.-. man. i was kinda pissed n kicked chin xiang LOL. comments : how violent. LOL
den soon lihao they all went out again. left us 4 again. den we watch again. lol. z zz zzz zzzz
finally they came back. but it was time that cliff,fs n roys wanted to go beach LOL. so again split group again -_- . den the remaining ppl in the room sleep. LOL. =x.
z zz zzz
while sleeping they came back. von went open the door. they on the light >.< . they want to sleep too. den chin xiang slept on the floor. xD. actually horz.
sad.. i reserve space for clifford but he dun wan.. sob.. =x
bleah bleah bleah.
lihao went out duno why
den von tell me she got gastric.
so i pei her go out to find food
found mac.. called zheng wei.. ask him wan anot.. den he say wan.. alot say wan.. den we waited.. for like 15mins.. diao.. we was wondering.. cannot be so long wad.. so called again.. what they doing? -sleeping- diao..
so we ate oursevles. had 2 egg mac 1 hashbrown 1 ice milo _______________ went back chalet.. still sleeping!!.. o.o. lol.. den chin xiang went out with zhengwei n bought food bck for roy cliff fs. lol. den all changed. went wild wild wet. it was like. 12.50 per person. den i help clifford pay fers. cuz he got no small change xD. went in. hmm.. it looked damn small to us suddenly. LOL.
1st we went lazy river 2nd the olar ring ( or something liddat ) den.. goosh.. chin xiang sit with cliff,fs,roy n me.. n .. we are like STUCK. o.o. den tried to pang seh chin xiang. LOL. but failed to. but 2nd time of taking this ride manage to push chin xiang to lihao they all . LOL. 3rd we played slide up. i parther clifford. den the float.. we need to push overselves till like butt touch butt liao.. den we was wondering how feesee n royston could do that. LOL. den woosh. cliff n i went down. haha. cliff n me was like " hmm.. not bad.. LOL. " 4th yellow slide. diao! so damn slow !! 5th den supposingly they wanted the sky rider. den half way. cliff roy fs n me again. we ran away for that olar thingy again LOL. it was fun lah. lol. the nicest i think. LOL. 6th wave pool - cliff n von almost drown LOL - 7th olar again 8th slide up again. this time i with kai ling cuz royston dun wan with gals. so i cant parther cliff =/. so lihao did. _____ went out with a stamp. ______ it was turn taking for bathing!. finally our 1st n last bath ( LOL ). went eat.. cliff n me n roy went KFC. kai ling lihao chin xiang went food court. den zhengwei joinED us.. den cliff came out with the idea of having macrowave food. LOL clifford is always the idea producer LOL. pro de he. LOL. really. LOL.
den we eat liao all go back chalet. n like normal lihao went out again. called me. say the escape can n dry. den they wanted to go. cliff n me dun wan but oso wan to go. LOL. den i n roy decided to go play lan. den von n lihao hear liao abit pissed =x. sorry lah LOL. den hung outside the door to decide. den finally decided. roy n fs n cliff n me went . the others went escape. went cheers cant find macrowave food. so i ask them wanna go to white sands shopping centre to buy anot den they say ok lor. n we went out LOL.
find high n low. cant find the one we wanted. but we found garlic bread ( ew ). LOL. so.. we decided for pizza. xD. bought 2. we rush back to eat. cuz we selfish LOL. hahahahahaha. we ate like as though we are savenger. LOL. be4 we ate the pizza. we took a pic. LOL. not bad. den we watch DVD again. n. got juicy show. LOL. while watching. we took another pic. erm.. got.. orbs?.. 2 orbs.. hmm.. lol.. den i told them.. all freak out.. n diao all scold me.. -.-.. den nvm.. we quickly act blur delete it. LOL. already abit bu shuang bu shuang liao.. den i keep quiet watch tv.. den later all sit on bed left me alone on the floor. guess wad.. i feel v extra niahz.. which make me even MORE bu shuang.

_________________________- tooooo beee connntinnueee- ___________________________________----

2004-10-24T13:01:00.000-07:00

another moodless dae_
lols_

dae started : 11.04
dae ended: duno lerhz.. now is 3.02 am.. tml still got school de_ =/..
another dae started ( which is a few hrs ahead ) : i think.. 6+

lols
yeahs..oks..

morning wake up_ father call me_ den_ laters ask me auntie go hellppp miiiee gooo taaaakkkeee soommmeethhhiinnngg tooo eattt lloorr_ den_ i brush teeth le_ fers thing _ computer`_ lols_ yah yah_
i live in the computer world man_ >_>den_ auntie came back i ate the porridge_ yummy~ 2 big bowls_ full le_ yawns_ lols_ den plaeeed ggunnbounndy with royston_hahahs_andrew nicol n me all hunting for the gm room lerhs lols_ den suddenly gl tell me the peacock code lols_ den i n him go types lors_ den unexpectedly nicol came up to me n sae " i got peacock lol " when guo liang n me never tell him lols_ den guo liang tot i tell him lols_ hahax_ den later found out is he found out himself de_lols_hahs_den yeahs_now all got peacocks le_except..royston i think_sad sad_lols_heheheh_all u need to do is to get the code **** **** **** den go gunbound.net den go shop den cash charge den free coupon den type e code lors_ lols_ =P_ i got plently of peacocks siah_ so nice_ but no status de so itz useless lors_hehe_den_i off n went to bath_headed for tuition

tuition after exams is like >_> .. but still itz $$_ dun waste the cash flow_ lols_ money hard to earn larhs_lols_hahas_
den_ left here at 2_reach at 2.23_ juz nices_ starts at 2.30 marhs_ hahs_no late_lucky_lols_den when i went into my room_ahh_that two gals again_they laugh at me siahz_lols_i oso duno why_juz act blur can le_anyways acting blur is my profession_lols_ ya der ya der ya der_ yeah! tuition over____________

went home_ on the wae bought mc donalds_ heez_mc spicy double anyone? lols_ haha_ but *plain* lols_hahx_ mayo sucks i think_ lols_ yaya_ den actually wanted to go cut hair de_ * so long le * den hor_ haix_ no mood too_ den nvm go le_ tml if got spot check confirm tio onE_ sucks lor >_> .. lols.. why must check siahz_our hair not ur hair >_>
lols_ jk_ check lor_check all u want_ lols_ itz MY life MY look MYself anyways.. hahx .. =p

went home_ immediatly.. wad i do? computer again >_> lols_ com freak i told yah_ lols_ ahahaha_ fers person to tok to : von , roy , fs __ lols_ hahs_ von i ask her abt.. hmm_ i duno_ i forget le_ she ask me something i think_ cannot remember anyways lols_ den roy is abt.. gb.. no change no change >_>lols.. fs lerhs.. the same old topic [ him ] lols_
hahs_ really lah fs_ i dun think i will give up larhs_ lols_ if the phrase " time can heal everything " is true_ den this waiting will be served_ anyways_ there is another saying " everyday's labour to make a fruit perfect " ( or something liddat ) itz like.. yeah_ i juz bear with it fers_ maybe_ if the fruit ripens_ i will enjoy the fruit_ `lols_ hope so_
i will not give up hope so easilys.. barhs_ i tried to let go_ i failed_ i can't_ encouragement on holding me_ encouraged to_ why not?_

as long as i see abit of hope_ i m contented_ juz a bit is enuff to keep me going_ yups_

lala_any any any any any gm rooom to hunt >_> `_

lols_ok_lost of words_duno wad to type_suddenly like_my mind is_ B L A N K! =/ lols_ oh yeah btw_ msn 7 succks lols_ itz fat n big_ n kinda laggy_ lols_ but there is some fun features too lols_ like u can nudge ur friend_ lols_ haha_ cool_ ^^_ den playing gb half wae_ lihao sms me_ lols_ his fone ar_ lols_ his bro take _ lols_ he heartache ar_ lols_but maybe can buy my fone_so he duno he should be happy or sad_he is like_contridicting larhs_duno him_ canot_ hehe_ but hor
lihao___[ any fone is good enuff_ anyways all fone have the same purpose ( communcation lol ) hah_ furthermore wad model u buying is still color fone wad_ so_ better den ppl who parents dun allow them to buy color fone mah_ be contented with wad chance u are given lors_ chances dun come knocking at ur door twice oks ]

lols_ oks_ enuff of leture_ hahx_ lala_ den go out eat dinner_ 'dinner' lols_ eat wad? salted fish siah_ lols_nice lerh_ so salty_ so nice_ wahahahax_ den_ drink mushroom soup_ n steal some of my cousin's egg omelette_ lols_ not badie_ lols_ enuff to fill my stomach ABIT barhs_ =)_ den lala till now_ not hungry_ but feel like eating >_>.. lols

den came back_ called lihao cuz he hint me he wan to tok lol_ which i welcomed willingly =D_ toking is good_ lols_ den_ tok some crap_ we looked at the year book_ laugh at ppl_ tok abt ppl_ suan ppl_ >_>_ lols_ sae " yeah.. everyone looked different " " omg so chio " " omg so ugly " " omg so fat " " haha! look at the face " yah da yah da..
u noe.. mean ppl are liddats_ meanieee miee lols_haha_ wan comments? free to givee u_ lols_ ahah_ den tok till 12 he need to put down_ cuz his father wannna use_ den he ask me call him at 12.30 - 40 .. den i wait lors_ between the waiting time i went to surf n edit my friendster profile lor_ lols_ not bads larh_ fs u own me a testi >_> lols
hahs_ den i 12.40 call him_ what the fuccking fucked_ he fuccking lie to me_ he fuccking slept_ what the fucking fuck_
>_> lols_ hah_ no fucking choice_ so i fuccking put down_ den i fuccking go fuccking chat on fuccking msn_ with fuccking ppl_ fuccking chat with fuccking them_ so fuccking boring_ den fuccking all fucccking slowly offline_ all fuccking go sleep_ so fuccking sian lor_ ops_ too much fuccking * btw all those fucking i typed is only for extra entertainment_ no offence* so i fuccking chat with fuccking zach_ hahx_

den tok lor_ since he only one online i tok to him till like 30mins le_ den_ decided to play gb together_ hehe_ hah_lols_den he used his noob acc cuz his blue wand he sold to bs le >_> den i also use my hammer acc lor_lol_we pwned those noobs siah_ so funnie_ den cuz my acc is gal mah_ den i acted as zach gf lor_ lols_ den so funnie siahz_ den half way_ zach go cook magggieeee mee_ den i went toilet_ lols_ buuddeeenn still win lor_ lols_ noobs marhs_ lols_ fun larhs _ =)_ lols den while playing we share some secrets yah? lols_ den i tell him the a,b,c de lol_ >_>
no lah zach [ a ] hor itz not bastard lah_ lol_ ur friend lai de lerh -.- _ anyways itz my fault to take his freedom larhs_ haixz_ but i duno why he so jui_ =\.. yeahs.. lols.. den [ b ] lol.. he dun wan go u wan go_ pro pro_ lols_ go no goood larh i tell u_ ny raciast larh_ sg good larh_ lols_ but small only >_> lol_ den [ c ] lerh u nv mention anything lols.. so nvm lol_ hahs_ =p

yeah_ thx for ur offer of asking me to join ur grp_ lols_ i duno wors_ next time den sae_ but i really appreciate ur offer_ hor lao da_ lols_ anyways_ joining is not easi_ lols =p_

at least i got 2 pillars if i fall_ one is xq de one is urs_ lols_ =\_ but honestly i prefer the current pillar_ but the current pillar is rottening le -.- _ no medcine can cure le_ unless_ miracle_ the medicine is within us only lahs_ u got the cure_ u dun wan use the anidote on me_ you leave me there poisoned =/ ..

lols_ errr... `× [ e n d i n g ] ×`- ¯ .__ lifted . shifted. higher than the ceiling _ whitechicks-LOLX says:can u imagine last r we were all praying that skool wont end?
yeah fs_ we used to do that_ lol_ now_ i still wished daes nv end_ i hate holidays sia_ but now dat_ i got hardly any best friend_ i dun look forward_ i look backwards_ wad we call e mermory _ yups_ now he hate me till the core_ really lor_ i duno why siahZ-

lols_ sian 1/2_ now 3.51.. i tio so long to blog juz those above? o.O wad a loser lol_ hah_

[u]___[ eh_ i really duno what i do that make u hate me so dammnn muchhie? _ even results oso cannot tell me >_>
receive things also cannot be from me >_> _ dots_ ok_ i noe itz ruined lahz_ but_ ruined things can be repaired_ juz need both parties effort_ haixz_ really_ i juz dun get it_ we are both stubborn wor_ u dun wan give in_ i dun wan give up_ merry christmas man_ haixz ]

fs___[ ahh_ dun pod sch lah lol_ 4 more daes with ur 204 only_ treasure it larh_ i confirm u that u will miss it de_ no matter how much u hate the class_ u will miss it de_ furthermore the more u hate something_ the harder to forget that thing_ yah_ so_ enjoy 4 daes till the fullest! =) lols_ hahx_ u own me a testi_ u write den i write _ yeahs_ lols_ ]

von___[ ?_ wahs u siow huhs_ u like making new skin siah_ lols_ ]

lihao___[ arggh! oh my fuccking god_ u fuccking lie to fuccking me_ lols_ =/ anyways EXPECTED hor? that time u ask me dun tell fs dat thing u also actually told fs_ u told us the same thing_ u ask her not to tell me n me not to tell her_ u v smart hor_ >_> betray? lols duno wads with u man lols ]

roy___[ oei_ really lah_ my ro cannot burn de_ not my fault_ lols_ btw_ na is not the end of the world lor_ i dun see why u cannot face the fact_ come on_ face it with courage_ u will beat it_ u WILL_ ]

oks lah_ i wan sleep le_ late_ 4 le_ 2 hrs of sleep left_ haixz_ lols_

song listened last be4 i stop blogging : a thousand miles <-- nice song lerh_ from white chick de lols _ v nice_ vvv nice_ =)_ u think time will pass me by?

2004-10-21T04:52:00.000-07:00

_`

nightmares falls`_
daes juz like daes_`

nth to blog_boring_no mood 2`_

i guess ur results are good_good luck in ur 1st choice class_`

`_well_ur wish came true barhs`_=)`_

wadeva it is`_ i m dead in ur world`_ =/`_yups_dead`

u die die also dun wan gimme a chance_

=/ _``

yeah_i noticed
3 best friends i got.. 1st -> [a] 2nd [b] 3rd [c]
[a] hates me.. dun wan forgive me..
[b] leaving singapore..
[c] going NA_` might quit school..
erm.. conclucion = no friends left_` haixz.. still i duno why [a] hate me so much_`

2004-10-18T02:49:00.000-07:00

a dae_ a ordinary sad dae_no improvement made_no chance given_no communication involed_

dae started: 6.20am
current: 4.40pm
end: should be 11- 12 barhs

oh`_tired_lazy_mi`took a rather LONG time to wake up in the morning_`bath`_wad so ever_` den went to sch_` bads`_spot check carried out_i was like omg?i got this damn long hair_`lucky_mr koh nv catch me_hengs siah_anyways_yeah_a dae that no teachers cared_whole class wondering around_floating souls_quite nice duhz_wadeva it is_still_nothing seems happy_

oh yeah_dang! itz a 'band' performing at our hall_is it nice?`_no comments_i really duno_half wae went to toilet with ken_walk around the school_trying to pod the performance_boring`_walking around hunting for weikiat n aizizul_` lame`_ cannot find in the end`_ they were in... the... u noe where...`_ (secret) [lol]

recess...itz recess..boo_`crap`_nv go eat_anyways i nv eat since that dae [you] dun wan pei me liao`_yeah yeah wadeva`_sit there_per normal_wotz_but todae is adnormal_you suddenly pop up siahz_i also duno what to do_how to reaction_n since u hate me so much_i guess best solution is did what i did juz now_well_might sound quite stupid_n fs sae dun do that agains_buts_i duno wad i should do to prevent further annoyance by me_`

went back class that time_saw hafizah alone like sad sad liddat_go tok to her lors_lol_i tell her things i should not tell_but_nvm_better release den to keep all to myself_she gave me a scenario: if A,B,C are 3 best friends_ A n B are closest_C is not always with A n B_suddenly one dae_C came n went into the middle of A n B_and C snatched B from A_what should A do?_wad can A do?_

scenario sounds familiar eh?_tsk tsk_but our is much worser i think_` i duno`

well well_sometimes things are meant to be like this_u meant to hate me_i meant to NOT hate you_i meant to wan this friendship_you meant to reject this friendship_` =((

okok_`den_finish toking cuz teacher ask us go in class`_yaya_`den time juz pass liddat lors_->tok`plae`guess`sleep`walk`<-[fight`sing`cry`]er_wadeva craps_ oks_den went to sc meeting`_ok great_wtf_ i m in charge of informing sec 1_ wad!?_nvm_simple job` finish_use isabel fone call lihao`_ooo_surprizing news_n after that_i guess i can guess whats happening although u nv tell me.. anyways u wouldnt_ den jl ask me issit i teach u one_siow lor_i so annoying de how to teach u_so actually she duno our thing_well_she was like wtf_` normal_i oso wtf anyways when i fers hear_ now still wtf too lol_ wotz_walking out so heng juz nice u walking back school_`n`_jl went mad_real mad_siow_use me as sheild cuz she noe u wouldnt come here_` sighs`_ sorrie if that annoys u too_ i cannot do anything wad_ she keep pulling me_ furthermore i cannot help_` cuz_ i will be EXTRA_ `guess so`_in case i m so i dun do anything best__` `_- wo yao bang ni ye bu neng` zhi pa ni ken tao yan wo_` jl___[ i wouldnt dare to ask n 'force' u like i used to_ i cannot care too much into this thing_cuz i m unwelcomed to_` all i wan to sae is that_ do treasure him if u accept_ he is really a v nice guy n he dun cheat ppl de_ so u can trust him for sure`_ do give urself n him some hope_ itz worth it_ u will NOT regret i tell u_ ] ch__[ well well_ u v patient worz_ proves that u v trueful to hers barhs_juz to make it clear horz_juz now i tok to her_i nv sae nth to harm u de horz_i will not do that_n i have no intention of hai you no chance de horz_ i will nv do that to you de`_ dun worry`_ i juz try to help if i can_i duno what i can do_cuz i noe totally nth_not like last time_yaya_ yi bu yi bu lai barhz_ give her some time_ okok_ i dun dare to sae to much`_ i noe how annoying i m to bother much into ur things`_ sorry_ juz hope u all the best, good luck =)) ] <>

fs_lh_[ no lor`_ still i will not let go lerhz`_ maybe by walking away is like ranning away_` but i duno wad i doing also lahz_`]

extract of the dae_`
xq blog : toEVERYONEreadingMYblog:DUNCHsigh; SMILEyeah?

pple out there`_ be happy`_ dun sigh yeahz`_ live ur live with smiles`=)` [ esp for ch + 105`03 ]

excluding me`

i wanna repeat again : "well wells_ now itz 1 - 2 weeks of school left_ advice : treasure ur friends now! only when itz holiday u will feel that u miss ur friend_ yeah_ no longer [u]_ i feel that feeling_not good ehs_"

[-treasure- `them` _to_ \the/ ` =)]

boring_` listening 2: the reason`_ : i m not a perfect person, there is many things i wish i did not do`_ :

2004-10-16T11:17:00.000-07:00

here it goes

havoc-tic dae`

_dae started at: 11+
_dae end at: duno lerhs_ now is 2.30a.m._ think the earliest is 4+ barhs_

todae` the annoying dae_ wake up only plae gb_ eat_ bath_ go out_
went orchard with my mother to do something_ den i sms von,xq n lh lol`_ see they free anots`_ all is either dun wan or cannot de`_ sians lols_ i wan watch movie marhs_ these fews are the one that have the higher chances of going out LATE des lols`_ in the end is no hope des_ lols_ oks so took cab from orchard backie home_ how muchs: 17.30_ expensive niahz_ i give him 50 bucks he sae : "eh_ got smaller notes? i no change.." man..wtf.. lols.. lucky i got 20 bucks lols_ den i gave lors.. sians lors..

went homex_ see the com_ ahhz_ noone tok to me_ sad _ lols_ den again_ went gunbound_ blah! a noob man me_
lols_ i miss alot_ a ebay wand ars_=P_seems like_ok`den plae plae plae_diao`suddenly roy ks me lor_ den

he sae " lol.. like u nv ks me be4 "

i sae " yayaya.. when we ks u den u get really pissed n maybe even log out "

den he started to suan me _ wtf?_ den he is like too much_ i juz keep quiet liao he still keep suaning me_ so.._i..._kicked him_ n.. ok wtf_ he got really mad_ he go change his nick to some soonnnnf horrible nick_ wtf man_ so angry for wad_change nick scold me nvm_but u played the 'game' too harsh dude_u used the forbidden person to counter me_i dun like that_u are like totally making it worse_u can do wadeva u wan_i dun care_but u dun go n disturb me n ch can?_cb lor_you are like saboing me`

n given ur chacracter i guess MAYBE u still not enuff go to ch n sae all the horrible things making real bad impression of me_wtf_aint that back stab?`juz becuz of gunbound u do this shit?_u played this "GAME" too hard pal_ u ruin it_
now if u did tell ch things_den_omg lor_making him hate me more_wt_

man_sicko lerh u_hai ren de_u duno how important meh_

extract from fs blog : <<[ you know when the quote that goes lyk..'pple come and go, but only friends leave foot prints in ur heart'or something liddat...my heart is filled with footprints of several him(s) and her(s)...and recently, a he joined those footprints.haix.i know that he isn`t really far away.but things are different now.it used to be simple and sweet.now, it has gone bitter? ]>>

hey hey_yeahs_millions of prints_aint us one of the deepest n nicest prints? yeahs_ n remember.. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ my deepest print among u pple with colourful prints that lit up my life_every print with different background,different meaning,different purpose`_ i like dem all_ meaningful_thx for everything_

i duno u refering to the same person anot_ but yeah_ it used to be sweet n simple_ now it have gone real rotten_if refering to the same person_ i guess itz my fault_i broke the band_wt_

yeahs_ end of storie

roys, btw_ itz not my fault.. maybe not ur fault too_ i duno_ but u played the another part of the "GAME" too harsh_ u break it fast de_ juz snap_ like " piang! " at juz the moment i saw that horrible humuliation_or wadeva_

ahhhs_ smsin lots lots to von n fs_ lols_ fs currently my night sms parther liaoz lols_ hors_ since the art dae_ we keep smsing_ lols_ fun isnt it_ lols_ sometimes things are juz meant to be simple_ dun make it too complicated_

von__[think_dun give urself too much hopes or too less hope_all this_juz see [luck] [fate] [soul]..]

fs__[ dun get too angry over that mac incident larhs_ juz one mistake_ someone makes mistake_ go listen to the reason larh u lol`_]

lh__[ my god larh u_ dun think too much_ although i think alot too_ but still_ my is facts_ urs is hallucination_anyways jus hope that u will not be_ flying to ur 'dream' land.. lols ]

roy__[bla_ no coomments man]

anders___[wtf_ ur art is damn nice lor_ a1 liao larh_ maybe at least at 80/100]

clifford__[eh`_nv plae with me gb 1v1 like we "discussed" lerhs]

bs__[go update ur wadeva sv n "enjoy" dling lol] ( how boring -_- )

ch__[erm_lemme see_hmm_er_oks larhs_if roys got tok u anything den_i also cannot do anything larhs_erm yahs]

well wells_ now itz 1 - 2 of school left_ advice : treasure ur friends now! only when itz holiday u will feel that u miss ur friend_ yeah_ no longer [u]_ i feel that feeling_not good ehs_

fs__[ aint my new pit black hole nice? i tot itz looked perfect` ]

oks_wadeva_

tick tock tick tock_ 3 liaos_ siows_ i type all this_ 30mins mehs_ pro_

aiya_ juz an hour or 2 ago_ went eat mac lerh_ den buy go NUS de hostel eat_ hahax_ nice wors_cooling_quiet_ the room vv small siah_ like_ jail_ lols_ n got a rule saying " if u bring a opposite sex friend_ MUST leave ur door ajar or other wise kicked out " lols_

hmm_ full_ stomach ache_ lols_wadeva wadeva_ lols_ oks larhs_ i duno what to sae liaos_ thats all for todaes barhs_

fs_[ ah.. u sleeping liao arh_ nv reply me de_ ]

anyways_i wanna sae is_i m still waitin for ur chance_ =)_ being one sided aint easy lerhs_ but i will try_ =) _ itz worth the wait_

lols_ oks_ shall stop here_ blog ended : 3.11 am. _ not sleeping yets. lols_ nights_

2004-10-14T05:43:00.000-07:00

last dae of exams_` alrighty_ all over`_ time for death`_ lala`_over over over_ wadeva`_

after art`_ went off_ clifford n i act abit_ tricked someone_ den went lihao hse_` god_ stink`_ anyways_ have lots of cocktail lol`_sleepy larhs anyways_

er?_ tml got cca_ wtf man_ walaos_ cannot go out with them_` haiz_ anyways i dun go also good at least [you] go..

alright_ emotionless -_-`

`_add ons_`
von-fs : maybe im juz a bridge you use to connect to jl..
-maybe barhs_ i duno_ but i dun think so barhs_` i trust you n i dun think so_

blah blah blah___ ` anyways_ wadeva it is_ i noe i piss u over ur patience__ ` reason: i duno` solution: not implemented YET` _ still`_ my best pal_

_`x_`the reason`_x`_

2004-10-11T22:33:00.000-07:00

`goddie_ itz home econ_ really v harrdiie siaaahzz`_ anyways` yesterday`_was quite a nice dae barhz`_ went out to JE library_ with roy,lh,fs_ ha?` den someone wanna eat pizza hors`_ haha`_ den go eat lors`

grrr`- the cap of the 2pid chesse drop in my bowl`_ ha`_ so_ sicked` den we sit ther` tok ` tok` tok`
tok for more den 1hr till noone left only US` haha` the people keep looking at us`_

n while toking we went into those topics which triggers me off thinking again`_ yups`_ everyone view it differently_`i duno`_

freedom
[may]be i [too]k t[o]o m[u]ch fr[o]m y[o]u
m[a]ybe i s[to]le u[rs]
m[a]yb[e] [u] [think] i [did] [not] r[e]s[pec]t u or s[ome]thing
may[be] . . .
[i] d[u]no`_

i duno lerh`_ u nv tell me`_ at least_ gimme a chance to change mah_`i duno u hate me up to which extend. . >_>..

even if it is one sided i will not give up`_

2004-10-10T05:22:00.000-07:00

things heaven got off my mind`u r still as important`_consoling cum convicing myself_` loading myself with reason n possibities maybe juz for one reason`_that is?`_i duno myself` juz too important =))`

life heaven change seens thenz` u lead ur own life when i lead my own` still wishing n hoping we can juz be like last time` by thinking of it itself` what a treat is ur friendship to me` _now its losts_ jus tryings to hunts its backiiiee`possible anots`_hope so`_anyways i will not stop trying de larhs` i would not let you too` juz imagine the level of contentedness if you tell me that you will give me a chance` heh` wad a dream` =\ _ juz hope _ juz try _ dun give up`

anyways,recently this weekz`_ busily loaded myself with exams`_ haha _ struggled thru nights juz to buckler up my knowledge` tried to find the key to lock those informations intos mys minds` _ sad kid indeed i m`

i guess you stole my loling soul too`_ itz gone`_ no enjoyment in loling_ totally "falt" lol` =((

importance -> our friendship > 105`03 friendship ` no offence dear 105s` _ truely u all sure know anyways` right f_s?l_h? v0n?` i guess so`_ anyways it can't be helped` if you wans it to be liddat, i only juz try to twist it, cannot change it`_ i m fighting a tough battle` _ act as though i m in some play or so ever`_act unhurt_act blur`_act happy`_n by all means run`run all u like`_dun see me_dun see you

what did i do that deserve such a big retribution`_ i juz dun guess it`_ reallyz _ wo zhen de dang ni shi bao ke shi ni dang wo shi cao_ ` cao ye hao bao ye hao`_ shuo shi me ye shi si lou yi tiao`_ wo bu yao`

hook up_ on the faggotic gb again` _ha but my aiming pisses me off`_ n bad andrew dun let me dk`_ =((.. got kinda pissed but anyways`_ min pissed onlyz hahz`_ andrew was like.. like u nv ks me` hoho`_ lame_

well,cool`_ tml no `[s]c[h]`_ itz dnt while i home econ`_ heh` good`_ at least you dun have to see me which annoys you =\` pls man` somehow try to change ur pov on me`_ juz dun think i m annoy in ur eyes`_ things will be fine_ jux fine_ trust me` oh by the waaaeee, iiif yoooou sooommmeeehooowwiiieee ffffoooouuunnnnd mmmyyy blooooggg, duuuunnn geeeettt toooo pisseeedd orrr eveeeennn moorrreeee annooyyyeedddd okksss`_

oh yeshz` toking much of these`_ i got my imagination ranning wild`_ thought of possible reasons` ha`

due to some facts maybe u juz not like our grp` juz hate being with me` lh n me shared a common thinking 'maybe ur another friends left you with no choice' or something ` i duno` maybe u juz thinkz i m petty or something` tell me man` i will try not to do the same thing`

______________________________nooooo iiiiii duuunnnnooooo annnnyyythhiiinnngg____________________________________

i only assume things` assumtion make me an ass damn it` make a fool of me` make a fool of everyone` look what i have done` i made a fool of everyonee`

i have got more to sae`_ but i shall keep it fers =))`+ i juz hope i juz wait i juz think`

hope my patients is worth the wait.. they often ask me ` is [you] worth my wait` i hope i m right`_-x [p]ra[y] x-_`

wotz` a pervert in my classs!!??`` godd` she betrays ppls isssittss` not good not good` change be4 itz too late` =)) you still have hope in ur futurrre beforrree itsss tooo laaatteee =))..

_u r a inspiration for me_` i m a irritant for you_

`x-`d[0]t`-x`

2004-10-08T05:09:00.000-07:00

things juz happen really fast.. too fast indeed.. just liddat one week past.. well.. now.. we are like duno each other liao? haiz.. duno u lahz.. can't we juz be like be4? u juz dun wanna gimme a chance =\.. said as "u notice u neglecting the other part of ur life.." now.. u neglecting us.. what the.. ok.. maybe u juz wanna avoid me.. or.. my sight annoys u further.. by all means.. tell me.. den i will not go with themz.. if u avoid them juz becuz of preventing urself from seeing me.. den dun.. tell me that n i will not be with them..

really..i duno wads so annoying when i folo u..others folo u can..i folo u cannot..what the..sorry if i m such a irritant to u.. i did not know all along.. still.. i will change.. but.. no chance given.. i can pratically do nothing..

u hate my behavior of avioding [A].. u ask me to give [A] a chance.. i listen to u i gave [A].. now.. i ask u give me chance.. u dun wan.. n u aviod me.. haiz..

wellz.. i act as though i dun care.. but.. u will never know how sad i m.. yes.. [B] is ur best friend..
[C] [D] [E] all are.. i understand..

sorry lorz.. i did not noe.. gimme a chance will yahz.. =\.. anyways.. maybe now i m ur emeny.. but u will always be my best friend =\.. all i can do is to hope for u to gimme a change barhz.. i juz can't let go our friendship.. =\..

_u r a inspiration for me_` i m a irritant for you_